Happy Women’s Day! Or Is It?

I know I’m late in posting this – but, who will care?

Happy Women’s Day

Every year, on the 8th March , the whole world celebrates this day as a respect to all the amazing women out there.

But, looking closely ~
I still see things happening which makes me question whether this is just a simple normal day with a tagline.

Women are still being whistled on the road…
They have to think twice before actually wearing that cute mini dress.

And,My dad still gets worried if it’s already dawn and I am not home yet.. As, we all know there are monsters on the road who just want to rob us our clothes.

The classic saga is still here after 25 years old, “it’s time to start looking for a husband” or, the wedding demands start pouring in like rain.
There is still that “OMG” expression when they hear that you are not proficient in cooking yet, because, you know you have been giving your time outside working hours to learning more skills & side projects.

But, who cares about that? 
Learn cooking – else what would your in-laws say? 😮

But, what I really wanna hear, what we all wanna hear is this –
“I love how far you have come on your career path” or,
“When are you building your empire”

Oh…and, then there are those women who don’t even know what is Women’s Day since, they are juggling between taking care of the kids and the home.

Imagine the high expectations imposed on the newly married bride…

So, who’s fault is that?
The society? The people? The Culturescape? The mentality?
Or, simply US? 

I don’t know why it is like this.
I just know that change comes from me, from you, from us.

And, on that day, I would like to say to all the women out there:

You’re freaking amazing.
You’re GOOD ENOUGH.

And, you can do things that no one would have thought you could.

Learn to say “NO” to what doesn’t make you happy.

You have dreams. I Know.
Have the courage to pursuit them.

And, for once be Strong Enough to Put Yourself First.

 

Happy Women’s Day.

They said, I am Weird & Stupid. But, am I really?

They told me I was weird, proud and every other word used to describe bizarre…

What was happening to me?

Is this what those big men called “growing”?
Whatever.. It is a strange feeling, but peaceful one inside.

I lost friends. The circle is small now. Very small.
I feel drawn to mature people. I love hearing motivational speaker.
I heard that if you wanna grow up, the path to this is lonely, hard.

I talk to the universe..a lot… I feel closer to the universe.. I get “SIGNS”.. People who meditate will understand what am talking about.
I am more calm and grateful. I have developed something for every night before I sleep:
“What are you grateful for today, Neha?”

And, that practice forces my brain to think and see things differently and thus, I now have something to be grateful for every single day.

And, even when things get rough, it’s as if the universe has my back.
Like last night, this week has been bad; like moody bad and yesterday, I was racking my brain to think what was I grateful for? I got the , “I’m grateful to be alive only.”
But, just at that moment, I checked my Instagram notifications &

Andrea Navedo (Xiomara in Jane the Virgin) had liked one of the pictures I had posted about the Flash!!!!

You don’t believe me? See for yourself:

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But, that’s not the only awesome thing that has happened.
Who would have thought that Todd Carey would follow & tweet me?
Who would have thought that Neha’s blog would get more than 110 followers, with 100 views per day?
Who would have thought that I would host Kindle Best Selling Authors’ interviews and be featured in Scriggler & Niume?
Who would have thought my ebook “7 keys to happiness” would get more than 50 views?

But, that’s not achievements.. that’s stupidity, they said

They regarded me as being weird..very weird.. 
I could no longer stand hearing people gossiping about others.
I remember, everyone had made a group and they were gossiping. About everyone. That what most people do. That’s suppose to be “normal” in this society I live.
But, I couldn’t stand that.
Being in that group, I felt like someone locked me in a box forever. I felt uneasy. Very uncomfortable. For they were the people I have been seeing since my birth.
But, I could no longer be with them.

So, I had a choice – To say No to this behavior or say yes and be accepted in the group.
Saying no would mean being alone… I guess, this is the reason why most people don’t get out of their comfort zone, for fear of ending up alone and not being accepted by everyone.

But, I said no & left. Knowing what would happened when I would be the only one who is not in the group.

“What is wrong with her – She’s very weird – or maybe, just rude. Bizarre -…”

They talked about me. They are still talking about me.

But, I don’t fit in. I just don’t fit in now.

What was happening to me? What changed?

But, I am happier now… 

I no longer feel the need to change myself in order to be accepted. I am my best friend.
I no longer fear loneliness.  My “me-time” has become the best time of the day!

But, they told me I was stupid when I rejected a job.. That I would never achieve anything in life.. They said, I was imbecile. 

I just wanted to do the job that I love. Because, doing something that I love would be call passion.
I didn’t want to end up like almost everyone who hate Mondays & love Fridays.
I didn’t want to be that person who lived only on the weekends.
No, I didn’t want to be that person who dies at 25 and isn’t buried until 75.

But, then they said that everybody has to settle in life. You have to take whatever you get. This is life. It’s called compromise and those who don’t settle never achieve quickly. 

But, how could I settle for less than I deserve when I know that I deserve the best in life? And , not just me. Everybody. Everyone deserve the best.
But, if you settle, you don’t get the best. Then, you have no right to be ask the universe why your life sucks, why your job is such a pain in the ass or why your relationship is so bad. You choose to settle right?
So, why complain now? Why complain?

But, Hey! What do I know? I’m just the weirdo of the society…

Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts.

I have come across so many people who hate their job, who complain every single day of their life every morning.
“I hate Mondays!” , “I don’t want to wake up to go to work” , “Hope the public holidays fall on weekdays” , “Thank God it’s Friday-no work for two days!”

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I have always questioned this; why is it that no one ever say: “I love my job”
We work for 5 days per week, some people even 6 days.
We spend 40-45 hours of our life in our workplace, so how can we live a life where most of the hours are spent in “no-happiness way”?

That always intrigued me and people always told me, “you’ll understand when you start working”
So, they mean that when I start working, my life will be miserable?

I have meant maybe one to five people in this country who adored their job.
Just imagine! In 100%, only 1-5% loved their job.

How to explain this? Without saying, I wanted to be among those 5% !

So, I did my research. I asked those 5%, what were their secrets? I mean, they had the same characteristics as those other 95% ; they rarely sleep, sometimes they don’t have time to eat, the work pressure, stress and deadlines were present in their work life too. So, how come they were happy? How come they never complained about going to their job every morning?

Their answers were more or less the same:
“I love what am doing” , “This is what I always wanted to be” , “I am living my dream career”.

And, I was like, “That’s it? This is the key to a happy life?”

Vishen Lakhiani, the Founder of MindValley Academy, preaches that our society has established rules in people’s mind from decades. Rules like, we have to go to college, choose the subjects, make a list of all the jobs that pay well and learn something which will help to get those jobs.

Let me tell you a little story: 
My cousin, let’s call him Max. Max loves Art, since childhood. He has always dreamed of becoming a famous, renowned artist. Since drawing is his passion, this has motivates him to research, learn, and improve himself in the most tiniest details. Max has become really good in Art. I have seen his work, it’s unbelievable! 
Max is in college and he is not really good academically. He hates Maths. But since it’s the rule of the society, Max has to learn Mathematics whether he likes it or not. Max wished that he could spend his days improvising himself on Art only, instead of trying to learn something which he hates. 

Results came out and Max got the highest marks in Art, but he failed in Maths. Max doesn’t care about his other grades. He has got the grade he needed to join a professional Art Institute. Happy Max goes and share his career dreams with his family. 
Seeing his failure in Mathematics, his parents gave him a good scolding but Max insists that he has the motivation & talent to become an artist. 
His parents rebuked him, saying that artists don’t make money! 
The society laughed at him, saying that he is lazy, he doesn’t like to study & that’s why he draws!

Max’s parents say that they are ashamed of him. They put him in a computer-course & warned him to remove this stupid idea of becoming an artist. 
The “rules” of the society killed his creativity. Killed his dream. 

Today, Max works as an IT officer. Max has learned computing. He gets good money. His parents are happy. The society labelled him from “lazy” to “hard working”. 
But is Max happy? 
Max hates his job. He complains every single day of his life. He loves Fridays & hates Mondays! 

So, is it because of the rules of society that some people are frustrated and unhappy in their job? Sure, there are other reasons.

But, how many people die at 25 & aren’t buried until they are 75?
Maybe if Max continued his dream, he would have become the most famous & rich artist and change the “rule” that artists don’t make money enough.

Some people don’t even know what they love doing. I didn’t know what I wanted to become till I was 20!

A lack of guidance? Nopes!
I had lots of guidance from teachers, family, parents, society. Some told me to be an Accountant, others be a Doctor. Some would say Banking! Why? Because banks make lots of money!
But nobody asked, “What do you love?” or “Just do what you love & makes you happy”

Thoughts. Thoughts. Thoughts.

Vishen Lakhiani said that, if you wanna know what you love, ask yourself just 3 questions.

  • What do you want to experience in life? ( e.g Travel, Health, Love, Car, House, Happiness)
  • How do you want to grow? ( What do you want to learn- this is related to your career, academically, spiritually)
  • What do you want to contribute to the society? (Anything to help people selflessly)

And as you will let it flow by responding to those questions, you are going to find your answers.

“Change your thoughts. So that when people ask you every morning where are you going, you don’t respond by saying ‘I’m going to work’ , but your answer is ‘I’m going to live a dream of mine'” ~ Neha Gunnoo